The dreaded playcentre

I can remember our first indoor playcentre visit clearly. A friend of Isobels had her 1st birthday at one. I vowed NEVER to return again and absolutely on no circumstances was I ever going to have a party at one.

Call me a snob but my first impression was pretty accurate. They usually smell like a combination of rancid oil and mould. The equipment is caked in some sort of grime from years of grubby little fingers and cleaning neglect. The food they dish up is enough to dissolve your child's' bones. Chips, nuggets, red cordial and pink ice cream cake with a list of flavours, enhancers and preservatives that would ensure at least 5 hours of hyper activity per mouth full.

BUT like all pre-baby or pre-toddler affirmations there was a short window of time when I decided to let go of these judgements, throw caution to the wind and take Izzy to the local playcentre with some fellow Mummy friends. It didn't seem as bad as my previous experience. The kids could run fairly freely while us mums were able to chat and be relatively relaxed...With bubba number two on the way, this playcentre thing was beginning to seem more& more alluring. I decided to return on one of my Nannying days - what better place to kill some time on a rainy day with two active toddlers?

That's when it all went really really bad. We arrived and the girls went straight for the ball pit. Before I could even plant myself on a nearby chair I noticed in horror (at about the same time as 10 other onlookers) that the little girl I was looking after was standing knee deep in the coloured balls with a stream of urine cascading between her legs.

My first instinct was to pretend I didn't know either of them and flee. As that was clearly not an option I went with Plan B; remove offending child and find help.

The staff basically told me that it was my responsibility to 'fix' it - they gave me a filthy dish rag and said I should clean the balls. Of course, it is impossible to clean out a ball pit on your own but I did what I could (not much with two toddlers hanging off me), changed Miss E in to some clean clothes and fled, red faced and very very traumatised.

It wasn't until I got home and came down from the whole event that I realised how awful the staff were. Where was the tape to cordon off the ball pit whilst it was being cleaned by me? Where were the gloves for me to use? The anti bacterial spray? There were kids back in the ball pit before I could remove any of the balls because no one helped me to tell the other 50 + parents that it was being cleaned. Not to mention the fact that I had to leave Miss E in her wet clothes in order to save other toddlers from jumping in to the pit.

It goes without saying that I complained. Both to the centre and to the local council. The local council were hopeless. They failed to see any issue with their lack of procedure for basic hygiene. The centre were predictably un-fazed.. I am sure they hear it a lot.

I can now safely say that I will NEVER return to another playcentre. Unless I can ever find one that is poles apart from the ones I have seen. Have you had a playcentre nightmare experience? Or do you know of a good one?